Recognizing that a loved one may be showing signs of dementia is never easy. The emotions that come with this realization—worry, confusion, and even grief—can be overwhelming. But should you tell your loved one they have dementia? In many cases, yes. Having an open, honest conversation is important for early intervention, support, and ensuring that your loved one receives the care they need.
Every person and situation is unique, and how you approach this sensitive subject depends on several emotional and practical considerations. Still, communicating early can significantly impact your loved one’s quality of life and help lay the foundation for a supportive care plan.
What Is Dementia?
Dementia is a general term used to describe a decline in cognitive abilities severe enough to interfere with a person’s daily life. It’s not a specific disease, but rather a group of symptoms that affect memory, reasoning, communication, and the ability to perform everyday tasks.
Dementia can also impact mood, behavior, and relationships, making it especially difficult for both the person experiencing it and their loved ones.
One of the key things to understand about dementia is that it’s progressive—meaning symptoms typically start out gradually and worsen over time. While occasional forgetfulness can be a normal part of aging, dementia goes beyond typical memory lapses. It involves persistent and worsening challenges with thinking, understanding, and functioning.
There are several types of dementia, each with its own causes and patterns of symptoms:
- Alzheimer’s Disease: The most common type of dementia, accounting for 60–80% of cases.
- Vascular Dementia: Results from reduced blood flow to the brain, often after a stroke or series of small strokes.
- Lewy Body Dementia: Involves abnormal protein deposits (called Lewy bodies) in the brain.
- Frontotemporal Dementia (FTD): Typically affects younger adults and causes changes in personality, behavior, and language before memory issues arise.
Understanding the different types of dementia—and how they affect individuals differently—is an important step toward compassion and clarity. When families have a clear understanding of what dementia is, they’re better equipped to recognize early signs, start meaningful conversations, and seek out the right support and care.
Common Signs & Symptoms
Dementia can look different from one person to another, but some of the most common symptoms include:
- Memory loss that disrupts daily life, like forgetting important dates or repeating questions
- Difficulty solving problems or planning, such as following recipes or managing bills
- Disorientation about time or place
- Trouble with visual perception, reading, or judging distance
- Struggles with language, including forgetting words or losing track in conversation
- Misplacing items and being unable to retrace steps
- Poor judgment when it comes to personal care or financial decisions
- Withdrawal from hobbies, work, or social situations
- Mood or personality changes, including increased anxiety, confusion, or suspicion
Noticing these signs in a loved one can raise concerns. But addressing them early may offer the chance to slow progression and improve overall well-being.
Should You Talk to a Loved One About Their Dementia Diagnosis?
Deciding whether to tell someone they have dementia can be difficult. Emotions run high on both sides—but honesty, when delivered with compassion, can provide clarity and comfort.
Emotional Considerations
Hearing the word “dementia” can be frightening. Fear of the unknown, confusion, and denial are all common reactions. However, withholding the truth may cause more distress in the long run, especially as symptoms worsen without explanation.
Being open helps your loved one feel seen and understood. It allows them to name their experience and take part in decisions about their future.
Practical Considerations
A diagnosis can provide direction, as it enables families to access treatments, establish legal and financial plans, and explore care options. The earlier these conversations happen, the more control and peace of mind everyone involved may feel.
Why Early Communication Matters
Talking about dementia sooner rather than later creates opportunities for support. Your loved one may be able to make their own decisions about care preferences, routines, or where they want to live. It also gives families more time to plan together—emotionally, medically, and practically.
How to Talk to a Loved One About Dementia
Approaching this conversation takes care and patience. If a healthcare professional isn’t leading the discussion, here are a few tips for family members:
- Choose a calm setting free of distractions
- Use kind, clear language—don’t overwhelm your loved one with medical terms
- Speak from your experience—e.g., “I’ve noticed some changes, and I’m concerned”
- Encourage their input and give them time to respond
- Be patient—repeating information may be necessary
- Reassure them that you’re there for support
- Seek professional guidance from a doctor or dementia care specialist
You don’t need to have all the answers, but being a steady, compassionate presence can make a meaningful difference.
Getting Help from Professionals
You don’t have to navigate this journey alone. Geriatric specialists, neurologists, and memory care professionals are trained to support families through each step—from diagnosis to care planning and beyond.
There are also communities designed to offer specialized care and a sense of belonging to those living with dementia. Memory care programs, in particular, provide structured routines, safety, and activities tailored to preserve cognitive abilities and promote emotional well-being.
Memory Care in New Hampshire
Understanding dementia and deciding when and how to talk about it with a loved one can be challenging—but it’s also a powerful step toward compassionate care.At All American Assisted Living at Londonderry, we’re here to support families every step of the way. Our memory care services are built around comfort, dignity, and connection. If you’re looking for guidance or exploring care options, we invite you to schedule a tour and see how we create a warm, supportive environment for your loved one.
